Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
