question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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