Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
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Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
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The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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