Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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