I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
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I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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