how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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