Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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