Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
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you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
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You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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