I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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