Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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