You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
