Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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