Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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