I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize