Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
