he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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