i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
