We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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