When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
