I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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