its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
