the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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