is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
