She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
