So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
