i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
