There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
