Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Randomize
