they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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