Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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