Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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