I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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