You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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