I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize