My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
