I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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