im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
