So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
