Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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