i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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