Don't make out with my wife yet
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It's shark week go big or go home
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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