We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
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My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
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I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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