i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
