True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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