ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
