Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize