Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
