I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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