I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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