There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
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